I had heard some rumblings about recession this and deflation that, but it seemed like something distant from my life. The bars seemed just as crowded as ever and at work the dining room was packed every night. I just didn’t see it and seeing is believing. Then I was faced with the harsh reality that I would have to move back to Palm Springs. I tried to make the best of a bad situation and the full horror didn’t seep in until I was knee-deep in harsh and sticky reality: Palm Springs in the off season in the middle of an anemic economy. Maybe I should back up a little bit.

A few months ago I lost my renter and that left me paying for two residences – something far beyond my financial reach so far. Unable to find someone to rent my condo I realized I had to suck it up and return to the desert. It’s July here and it’s crazy hot, not the best place to be if you hate AC. Petey and I lay in front of the box fans patiently panting, waiting for the sun to go down so the poor dog can get out and get some running in; right now, after 10 mins in the sun he begins to over heat and runs for the nearest shady spot.

Some of you might be asking yourselves “Did you quit Channel1?” No, but porn does not pay everything. Petey still needs to go to dog camp and daddy needs his East Coast fixes. So much like the rest of you I need to work to keep this family in the life to which we are accustomed. Dance gigs and appearances are slim these days. I saw this coming though. About 6 months ago there was a huge influx of gigs, I theorized that this was the clubs’ last attempt at bringing in some bodies and once they saw that people just weren’t coming in no matter what they did or who they had, they stopped booking.

Palm Springs and I have a past, but I didn’t think we’d have a future. This is a place where I am, as BW so eloquently put, a prisoner of my property, I can’t find work here and to be honest, there is a surplus of really strange people here. I think it’s the heat, and yet I walk outside in the morning or will be driving somewhere and the light will catch one of the 4 mountain ranges and I will be speechless at the raw, unadulterated splendor of it all. “Fuck, that is so god damned pretty!” and I forget that I’m almost running on empty.

The San Francisco Bay Area Reported posted a lovely article about the porn star series on here! TV that starts tomorrow night. I was heavily featured in the article so I thought I would share it all with you.

Just got back from Mexico. If I owe you a phone call – don’t hold yer breath. Must acclimate!

The story of a dildo in the making is one I’ve gone over so many times in my head that at some point I assumed I had already written about it here. Then the C1R PR guy wrote to ask me for a few quick words about my experience and I was unable to cheat and copy from the blog because the story wasn’t there to begin with.

So here we go… picture it, 2005, a hot, summer day in the San Fernando Valley. I showed up at an enormous factory and was promised a tour after the deed was done. They asked me if I needed Viagra and I refused, so confident in my ability and unaware of what was to come. I thought that this would be carried out in some sort of special room with flat screen TVs playing the porn of my choice as well as candlelight and plush pillows. Instead I was led to what can only be described as a store room with a gurney, an Ikea room divider and lots of fluorescent lighting. This was not what I expected in a million years; I at least thought I would have some stimulating experience going on the monitors, I also never expected that the guys involved in the “casting call” were not going to speak any English and they were not going to be Gay. This is so hot and it gets so much hotter.

The door opened in front of me and after a poor attempt at introductions by the ringleader of the little gang of frightened Mexican men the dude threw me a hospital gown. I responded that I didn’t see it necessary given the circumstances of my little visit here. He told me kindly that it was not for me but for them. Great. Because I was so comfortable before. I ducked around the room divider and prayed that this would all work out.

“Ready?” I heard from beyond the compressed wood chip panel.

“Ready” I responded half-heartedly and quite terrified. I thought that the “ready” meant are you ready to get this party started and after 3 minutes they began shouting and I realized that it was not what they meant. “ready?” meant the party was already in full swing. I was not and nobody bothered to tell me that this little production was on a very tight schedule and set of rules.

You see, the mixture of magic goo they use is only good for like 3 minutes before the zenith of activation is over and it must be thrown out if the mold was not cast successfully. I also have to stay really hard for about a minute while the plaster is setting on me to ensure that the mold is accurate and set. This was beginning to scare me. I had no idea how I was going to get trough this. Not only was I fishing for stimulation in the deepest recesses of my brain but I had less than 3 minutes to do it and hope to God it’s hot enough to keep my pecker at full attention long enough for this mold to set.

The first two times did not work out so well. I was able to get it up but I had to race around from the corner, hop on the gurney and then they had to stick this cone with a huge rubber ring at the end around the base of my dick and press down very hard to create this suction and then the other dude poured this very, very cold dough over my very, very overworked and very, very nervous schlong. I think the 3rd or 4th time was the last. It either worked or they just gave up; my focus was on maintaining what I had and staying at that sexy place in my head.

It was one of the most memorable, rewarding and difficult activities that I have to do in this business yet.

I got my tour as promised and as we were walking into the show room. Ma Hazzard called and asked me quite nonchalantly if I got my “dick done” yet. I said yes and I began to describe the room I was in and all its various rubber orifices staring at me. She asked me if they had any vibrators. I was lost at this point and knew we had a professional here and I thought it best that the request be forwarded onto him. He giggled and then began to walk around the floor grabbing this and that off the wall, the hook or out of the basket all the while laughing and laughing like he was talking to his best girlfriend. He hung up, walked back to me and said “She is soooooo cool” as he handed me the phone. I know she got a lot of shit and I think one of them was on a key ring!

Earlier this month I had the opportunity to visit Philadelphia for their 14th Gay and Lesbian Film Festival courtesy of our friends at TLA.

In addition to some quality time with the Boss Lady and Blake Riley I got to hang with some Channel 1 VIPs that we do not get to see very often. There were many highlights during the weekend in the city of Brotherly Love, but there were three in particular that I would love to share with you.

First, a while back I was sent an e mail from a young girl titled “Ode to Johnny.” Her name is Stoia, she works for Digital Playground and she’s gorgeous. It was most complimentary and flattering. Well lo and behold she is from Philly and TLA took this opportunity not to only have us meet but create a mini movie to document the entire ordeal from her writing the ode to our long awaited meeting. The movie was shot in black and white with a fifties motif. In the final scene we sharing a milkshake in front of a vintage soda shop; it was the best milkshake EVER!

Saturday evening we had the chance to schmooze and booze at a club called Pure. This was the chance for us all to hang out and be ourselves with no cameras, pens or other obligatory what have you. We were Free to Be. Early in the evening Chi Chi was scheduled to speak at an event that coincided with the Film Festival, but was geared more to, well, porn. As the limo pulled up to the theatre the first voice I heard was that of our lovely Hazzard Ahead contributor and my biggest fan on the East coast, RitaPHL! She was bright-eyed and looking very sharp with her new do! She later informed me that it had been two years to the day since we met in Bean Town when she and her husband Jim were on holiday being served by yours truly at Aquitaine. It was wonderful to see her.

Our editor at Channel 1 created a video montage of Chi Chi, Blake and me that was played before she went on and it was sooooo amazing. I asked them for a copy and I’m hoping to have it soon to feature here – I promise! After Chi Chi’s talk we opened the floor up to Q&A. My number one fan raised her hand and asked if I could sign her B-Rude original T shirt. It features my mug and pecs splattered on the front with “Blow my Speakers” as the caption. I gladly signed the shirt and was amazed that she was able to snag one. After Rita walked away Chi Chi turned green with envy that Rita was able to get her hands on one. At the end we were passing out our latest picture book “Smut” and I made sure my girl got one! Enjoy it Rita! And thank you so much for all the effort you went through to get there!

Before our night out I managed to bug everyone with my digital video camera. Since there is some mild nudity and some appearances by folks that would rather not be featured I am including just a small piece here. The full version will be on Hazzard Central in a few days time. Enjoy!

I love traveling to the East Coast (especially on someone else’s dime) thanks Eric and thanks Philly!.

Once again my method of enjoying something by dreading it first paid off. The pride festival was thoroughly enjoyable Saturday because the crowd was pretty thin. And even though the beer was crap – it was only $5 so at least we didn’t feel robbed of cash as well as flavor.

Thank you to the many fans that stopped by to say hello and get a signed photo of me. I was especially pleased to see so many girls this year! Gay porn IS for everybody! And since Boy Wonder was there we got plenty of video for you to enjoy.