Saturday, January 12th 2008
Anything With A Pulse Is Lunch
My last meal of 2007 was shrimp tempura and it was amazing, but it was my second to last meal of 2007 that deserves mention.
Having missed every blessed holiday of the season due to a job that ended up in the crapper I thought it only fair to surprise Ma Hazzard on her birthday. This meant an ungodly early flight out of LAX on January 1. Thankfully, my webmaster lives in close proximity to the airport and had no conflicting plans to prevent me from crashing at his place and begging a lift.
Boy Wonder suggested we visit a spot he found called “Raw” in Santa Monica. It’s not sushi, but raw cuisine, living foods that are not cooked above a certain temperature and are considered “alive”. I was torn. I had “living food” once before in San Francisco and it did not agree with me or anybody in my party. I suspect it was the coconut soup. I did enjoy the rest of the lunch though and figured what the hell, I will try it again this time avoiding coconut milk or anything that billed itself as a living soup.
The menu was sent to me via e-mail by Boy Wonder due to the extensive list of items. It was a thoughtful and efficient idea, but I wish he had not because we waited for ages to be noticed at our table and I would have liked to have spent that time looking at the menu instead of wondering where the hell our server was. I had to get up twice before we got our first course. This food had better sing and dance because I was hungry and getting annoyed. In my opinion, being a high standing member of the service industry, the first couple of minutes before you approach a table are very important. Chances are the guests are hungry and a minute or 30 seconds to you can and does usually seem like an eternity.
Eventually she came around and we began our experience of the living dinner.
The menu is set up in a suggested order of courses; one of the ideas behind this sort of thing is to eat things in an order that maximizes efficient digestion. This meant dessert first!
;)
First course, THE ORGAZMATRON, a rustic parfait of sorts with a buckwheat crust and creamy avocado finished with nuts, ginger and mint. We were in heaven. Amidst the exhaust fumes of passing vehicles and a seemingly endless onslaught of construction noise there was a party going on in our mouths – and everybody was invited. The Orgazmatron truly lived up to its name!
;)
I had THE SEA WITCH for my mid course and Boy Wonder had the MAKI S&M SPECIAL. I said I was going to avoid living soups, but I love seaweed soup and I saw no mention of coconut milk or anything else ominous. The MAKI S&M SPECIAL was an interesting take on sushi with a Pumpkin Seaweed Walnut Pâté rolled with Avocado, Cucumber, Purple Cabbage & Tomatoes served with a spicy mustard & Nama Shoyu.
My soup was perfect, warm and loaded with ten varieties of seaweed. Meanwhile the “sushi” was really something; the thought and energy that goes into a production like that is worthy of high praise and hard not to enjoy.
;)
We finished with what we thought to be the most intriguing items, the PESTO PIZZA, a deep dish warm “pizza” and a BACON WESTERN DOUBLE “cheeseburger”. The pizza was made with a buckwheat crust topped with a walnut pesto, tomato, Italian herbs, olives, marinated onions & mushrooms. That was mine and let me tell you it was amazing.
;)
Boy Wonder’s “burger”, a Mushroom Nut Burger with Macadamia “Chez”, heirloom ketchup, Fig Mustard and Zucchini fries was arranged open faced and we ate it in pieces with this on that and that on this. So good, the “cheese” was nothing short of a culinary masterpiece.
Dinner was the perfect amount of food, any more would have been gluttonous and uncomfortable. Not a bad price point for what was a creative and difficult dinner to prepare. In my opinion, not cuisine for the every day, but perfect for those special occasions when Pumpkin Ravioli, Cornish Hens and Flourless Chocolate Torte don’t float your boat.
Oh dear Johnny, you have such a wit with words. When you told me that you were going to blog about a meal at a Raw foods place, I was thinking… how boring. But of course, the irony of the title alone is enough to make this girl laugh, OK I smirked… but you know me… when have I ever given into laughter? Well OK I did a bit of laughing on Tuesday. But I have to admit that being in your presence for the first time in almost ten years was rather a relaxing experience. And at times the look on your face was too much.
For your fans and the sake of Boy Wonder, I will have to relate the most amusing part of the day. Sitting there with Johnny sharing a meal and catching up on old and new times, back in the neighborhood that we both love and detest at the same time. Johnny drinking his apple celery juice (just the idea! ick) and I sipping my cappuccino, while this artist is sitting behind us, dreams of Johnny making her famous because he made his own pant. He told me what had transpired before my arrival, and then he leaned in a bit over the table and said in conspiratorial tones that he had to dash that poor womans dreams of using him for her own quest for fame and just out and out tell her that he is not in fact a famous actor but in fact a gay porn star. I seriously have never been in a more surreal or humorous situation that that.
Johnny dear, you are a nut case. I cannot believe you actually blogged about this.
Dear Mary & Joseph, that looks good….and the way you describe it….
If I hadn’t just devoured a pint of ice cream, I’d be hungry just from reading this!!
The food sounds really creative, and I have to admit I was skeptical of “living food” (to be totally honest, I’ve never heard of it before this) but wowww, when are we getting one of those around here???
Conjuring images of long-time raw food advocate Woody Harrelson. Did you and Boy Wonder share an after-dinner spliff, too?
I recall hearing about this L.A. raw food trend a couple years back, and am pleased that you reported in on your experience.
I tried looking up RAW on the internet … is the correct restaurant name Juliano’s Raw Planet at http://www.planetraw.com? If so, the place does look great, and I was pleased to read that they serve alcohol, (albeit only wine). If Jim and I ever visit, we’ll have to remember to bring along our flasks.
Great idea ending the restaurant review with a video clip! You should definitely do that again. (Although, I imagine having your Boy Wonder one-man video crew along every time you dine out would be most impractical.)
And, Johnny, what up with the job scene? Was this same place with that puck-ass owner who left you that lame-ass tip?
Rita – Yes, that’s the place. I suppose a link would have been in order for this post. Duh!
Thanks for the comment!
so cute in the video – so cute.
I have left that terrible spot in Palm Springs the day after that Thanksgiving “encounter” with Scrooge.
I am in the midst of changing up the scenery a bit here in So Cal and will most definitely keep you posted.
Good thing this entry is a few month olds. That means few people will come across this embarrassing confession. I was browsing through the food & wine section to find something nice to read and make my generic ratatouille on rice more palatable. Now I find myself getting an erection over a deep dish pizza (with or without Mr Harrelson and an after-dinner spliff though I’ll gladly take both.)