Hazzard Ahead
Johnny Hazzard Blog

Friday, June 15th 2007

Herr Hazzard Sheds

Posted by Johnny

Doing the Grabbys was a lot of fun, but there was one small thing that annoyed me. It was my hair. Because it is so long and thick I have to plan days in advance if it is to be shown at an event such as the Grabbys. I have to wash it in enough time so that by showtime it is relaxed enough and the oils are distributed through my scalp and hair. It is exhausting – especially to a low maintenance guy like me. Not to mention that I find hair everywhere all the time. Usually I keep my mane under the cover of a bandana or perhaps my favorite Pink Floyd baseball cap. That allows me to keep the beast under control and provides me with an excuse to don head gear; my favorite accessory. When doing dance gigs and co-hosting events the Pink Floyd hat does not bode well. So I spend time and energy taming the beast and getting it ready for outside world.

On Wednesday last week I woke up, took a shower and spent the usual 10 minutes washing my hair and another 3 picking it up off my white bathroom floor. At that moment I took a look in the mirror and felt an urge to cut it. This was fleeting as I began to brush it and noticed that it was getting to that perfect length where it can be pulled behind my ears; I love doing that. I walked outside and encountered the first day of summer here in the desert. It was 103. That feeling I had after I finished my shower had returned and stayed with me all day. I couldn’t shake it, the thought of shaving my head seemed not only rebellious (I also love doing that) but extremely comfortable and free; two things that dictate the way I live. So I took the shears to my scalp later that night.

Let me tell you, it was a shock to see all that hair falling around me. I ran my hand over my head and was so excited that there would be no huge Albert Einstein hair to calm in the morning and no more strategic pomade application to my temples and the roots of my crown. I was free from all that, plus feeling the wind blow over my new skin was intoxicating. I was also sooooo glad that I have no odd crevices or bumps on my head, I have a perfect head shape if I do say so myself. Thanks ma!

I know there will be some tears and gasps, but I like the new look and that is what this business is about to some degree; changing it up and keeping you guys (and girls!) surprised. Aside from that, it’s Palm Springs people and there’s no way I’d make it through the summer heat with those curly locks!

the new do

Hair-less and fancy free.



15 Comments for this post

 
D_E Says:

Hey, good for you! Summer isn’t the time for big hair. Keeping it easy and cool is a good idea. People will probably be wanting to touch it, because it feels nice.
And by the time you’re fed up with this, I bet you’ll grow it back quick enough.

 
Rita PHL Says:

Mr. Hazzard … very well done, Sir!

I’m all for a man with a beautiful mane, but must admit a shaved head delivers a wonderful thrill all its own. Do you plan on keeping it close or will you be letting it grow out again?

 
gcracker Says:

Well, from what I can see from the aerial view it still looks good!! You’re one of those lucky guys who can pull off most hair styles, I think.

I do think I see a little crevice though…see it? It’s right there…no, I’m totally kidding, your head really *is* perfect! :P

PS What are those sunglasses? They look just like mine, but I am sure they’re better quality. (Mine were four bucks at a Sheetz….and I got what I paid for.)

 
Genor Says:

Johnny, I LOVE IT! I usually shave my head every few days. Lately (like, oh, the past 3 weeks) I have been letting mine grow. Weird… I grow, you cut. I’m sure the summer heat will have me grabbing for my clippers soon, too. I just wish that the summer heat was the only reason I shave my head. Unfortunately I haven’t been blessed with great hair genes you have. I’m waiting for that pill I can take that will restore the hairline of my youth. Oh, did I have great hair in high school though. lol

 
DrkDare7 Says:

Hey there! I thought I’d noticed something different about you! Looks really good! Especially due to the hot weather!

 
Johnny Says:

I will keep this length give or take… having a shaved head is sort of like an etch a sketch… I can shave arrows or zig zags and in about a week it grows out so I can start a new design.

The crevice that you see is a scar that I got when I was a little boy. I was running and my parents had that 70’s frosted glass wall in our living room. I tripped and hit my head on the only exposed corner creating quite a blood bath and an evening trip to the ER.

 
the frog Says:

That sure looks cute from above. Makes me wish I was a bird (no, not to shit on people’s heads. I can do that from my height.)

Johnny, you could have been describing my own hair – if you wanted to be generous. Aside from the fact that I don’t look half as good as you with my hair behind my ears, I keep it short for roughly the same reasons. It’s a bit late for advice but when in high-maintenance crisis, do as I do: black underwear. As a bandana. You’ll be surprised how it distracts from the real issue.

 
gcracker Says:

Johnny, I was totally kidding, I didn’t see a crevice before. Now I know that it’s there and I still can’t find it. Maybe I’m blind? Is it on the right or left?

I’m determined to find it now. I’m gonna look for hours. :P

 
gcracker Says:

Oooh, I think I found it! With no help at all! Go me! No worries Johnny, it looks like it’s just the grain of your hair, not a scar from a traumatic childhood accident. Scars are exciting anyways. :)

 
Joej888 Says:

I think that scar is cute, after knowing about the Johnny’s “traumatic childhood” thing.

And BTW, Frog, your “bird and shit” joke makes me laugh aloud! IT’S SOOOOO funny! Whenever I think about it, I just can’t help laughing! Oh, mine ~ I have to tell my friends about it!

 
the frog Says:

Joke? What joke?

Ooops, sorry. Was that your head?

 
Joej888 Says:

Maybe it’s not a joke, but it’s really funny when you said you wish your were a bird not to shit on head.
I don’t know why it’s so funny to me.

 
D_E Says:

hazzard ahead: beware of flying frogs

*wears a hat*

 
the frog Says:

Smoke on the water,
Frogs high in the sky

(the tricky part is rolling the joint without dropping it in the pond.)

 
DarkWarrior-413 Says:

What I want to see is a full frontal view of this new do! I’ve always thought your face is very expressive. The thick black hair is the perfect frame for the canvas that is your face. The aerial shot bodes well of the frontal view. Come on Johnny, give us the new view! While those curly locks are sumptuous, this close crop promises a more level of physical and personal connection to your inner being. That’s very appealing.

I’m new to posting to your site. Finally figured it all out. Glad to be able to connect. There’s so much more to you than a mere adult films performer. I’m glad for that. You may find that you’re more European in your thinking than American. My German friends told me that was what set me apart from my Army comrades. I wasn’t afraid to think for myself and hear something other than the official sanitized American rhetoric. I miss those days and those folks. Leather Weekend in Frankfurt was a blast!

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