Hazzard Ahead
Johnny Hazzard Blog

Friday, March 9th 2007

I Can See My House From Here!

Posted by Boy Wonder

Johnny and I are always learning more things about each other. You’d think by now we’d be bored sick to death of each other, but that just isn’t the case – with me anyway. :-P For example, this past weekend I discovered a slew of interesting things about Johnny’s life at home. This was only my second visit to his place in Palm Springs and the first time I stayed there so cut me some slack!

You're soaking in it!

Chocolate syrup in the fridge, bargain brand soap in the shower, no favorite eateries, single-ply toilet paper, the faint aroma of fabric softener lingering about – I was in shock! Who WAS this person? And what’s up with clipping your nails while you drive downtown? I was very grateful when most of these things were explained and/or demonstrated to my satisfaction. The syrup is for protein shakes, the soap left behind by his renter and fabric softener is very good at removing wallpaper. Our dining trials proved why a cook-at-home lifestyle is probably best in Palm Springs. I still have to ask about the bog roll; I mean, really – what is this? The frontier? Get two-ply, it’s not that much more and there are certain things you shouldn’t skimp on!

Our ride on the Palm Springs Tramway was probably the highlight of the weekend; though a close second for me would have to be when Johnny said my car was “sexy”. Of course with me on the scene it was documentation central so I was able to whip up this video of our trip. Now you can watch to see how fun it is to go from this:

Desert

To this:

Winter Wonderland

in eleven minutes time. Enjoy!



14 Comments for this post

 
Marastar Says:

You know.. the main thing I thought about after I read this thread was the 1 ply toilet paper… man, that’s gotta hurt after a while :(

Meanwhile, Johnny, how does it feel knowing that the whole world now knows what kind of paper you wipe your bum with? If it were me, I’d be disturbed in a comical kinda way.. lol

 
Genor Says:

I chuckled when I saw the title to this post. Earlier in the week when I read that you had went up the mountain I was wondering to myself if you could see your house in the pic.

I have taken that trip and it’s awesome! What I remember most is how cool it was to watch the airplanes land and takeoff from so high above. It’s a really cool place and experience.

 
Boy Wonder Says:

Well, you can’t really see Johnny’s house from that perspective. I just thought the title was catchy. :-P

 
Johnny Says:

To answer the question about the TP.

I have the 1 ply paper only because I have this really cool toilet paper holder that hangs off the side of the toilet freeing up space on the floor.

What I personally use is a moist wipe called Tooshie Wipes. I do not use the dry 1 ply as previously thought.

 
Boy Wonder Says:

Just as I said – everything explained and my faith is restored! By the way, thanks for keeping me in the dark about the high-class towelettes and letting me use the third world reject stuff. I can only imagine what must have gone through your mind when you were at my place suffering with my Charmin Ultra.

 
Joej888 Says:

Wow ~ I wish I could go there. How lucky that you guys are American!

Oh sh*t!I have to go back to school now!

 
the frog Says:

Those homoseksual bloggers have no shame. Among their many offending habits, they not only use toilet paper but boast about their achievements. It’s right there on the gay agenda, dated march 10th. “Encourage men to wipe their ass so they get used to the idea.” Our tadpoles must be protected. From now on it’s diapers till they’re 18.

And they say us frogs are dirty-minded…

 
Marastar Says:

Ok, now that wasn’t the response I was expecting but I am impressed by it!

So the toilet roll holder is cool and you look after your butt better than probably 95% of the world’s population: Cool. I guess that stands to reason when it’s immortalised on film, you’d want it all pristine. :P

So Boy Wonder, I take it your “1 ply experience” wasn’t an enjoyable one then? Yeah I had many arguments with my mum over that, she used to get the crappy 1 ply that was made from recycled paper and that, it’s not on. (This was when I lived with her) It’s like your sanding your asshole off and letting a new one grow back or something.

Meanwhile, this thread was meant to be about a holiday or something eh?..

 
Boy Wonder Says:

The digression is amusing; therefore, allowed and even encouraged. No sacred cows!

 
the frog Says:

No sacred cows? How about pigs?

What I want to know is how come a nature-friendly socially-aware guy like Johnny (and by proxy his webmaster) does NOT use recycled paper. Do you think you have better things to shove up your ass? Didn’t your boyfriend teach you ANYTHING during those holidays? (To those who missed it, there actually is a corellation between the two questions.)

OK so neither do I.
But that’s just because they don’t always carry it where I shop.

 
Johnny Says:

Mine is……………its just wet newspaper from the week before cut into rectangles and compressed.

 
Marastar Says:

I use a bidet…

No I don’t really, I just wanted to say that because it sounds snobby.

 
Boy Wonder Says:

I miss having a bidet. It really is the most civilized, effective and environmentally sound way to scrub up the bum. But then what would we have left to talk about on here? :-)

 
the frog Says:

Ah yes, a bidet… Our bathtubs would be so grateful.

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