Time for the wayback machine again. Back to a time in Johnny’s life that wasn’t so very pleasant for him (and not so thrilling for the rest of us either). Third party counseling, teenage angst, sibling rivalry - the works! I remember a lot from that time, especially a counselor telling us that we couldn’t/shouldn’t try to live our lives through our kids. (i.e. What you want for your children isn’t necessarily what they want for themselves.) Parents like to say things like, “I want you to go to college so you don’t have to dig ditches for the rest of your life” – “I want you to be successful” - “I want you to be happy”, etc., etc., etc. It’s a fine line to walk between guiding your child and driving him.
As stated in one of my older entries, I have been ‘geographically challenged’ and so was my husband. We planned to travel a lot, but obviously that never had a chance to happen. I thought about that the other day and realized how much Johnny and his brother have traveled for us. Carmen is exceptionally bright, very analytical, etc. At one time he worked as a technical expert for a micro-biology company. At a moment’s notice he’d be packing his luggage and taking off for a major hospital in the U.S. trouble-shooting for them. And now I look at Johnny traveling to God-knows-where doing his gigs and signings. This fall he’ll be on his way (with Sarah) to South Africa! Hello? I AM living my life through my children!
It’s hard to believe so many months have passed since Johnny and I drove up to Boston together. What a wonderful time we had! I would do it again in a nanosecond. Now the summer is practically gone and I haven’t made it back up there as planned. Why does it seem as though the more I want to take it easy, the more time flashes by? I’m in sales and my success is based on my customer service. They call, I respond! While I’m still dreaming about warm nights outdoors in P’town my local stores are already putting up their freakin’ holiday decorations! Give us a break!
Oh yeah, back to Johnny. Speaking of the holidays, since my husband and I always worked, Johnny, being the older of two sons, learned to be independent at a very early age. He fought hard enough not to go to “day care” after school so he was charged with heating up meals that I made on Sunday for the week. Funny how certain times stick in your mind – yet you tend to forget many others. During one of his Christmas breaks from school he was bored and called me at work. (Johnny and I are both “Type A” personalities, i.e. we have to be busy and have scheduled days or else we’re biting our elbows). So I told him to be adventurous and start making some Christmas cookies.
Every year I would make 100 dozen cookies and approximately 100 pounds of chocolates – hey, if I could get a head start on it, why not? So, I came home from work to find Johnny with cookie dough literally up to his elbows. Stifling a smile I asked him how he was doing with the recipe. “Man, these recipes that tell you to mix by hand are really hard, Ma.” We laugh about that to this day. Now, when a recipe calls for ‘mixing by hand’ he takes a spoon to the mix!
Recently Johnny lost a filling after 18 years. You wouldn’t believe it by looking at his beautiful face and body now, but he DID go through some terrible teenage years where your body just doesn’t cooperate with you. Dermatologists, dentists, orthodontists, etc. He would get so pissed about his teeth. Johnny would eat healthy – fruits, vegetables, avoid sweets, etc. and get cavities. His brother Carmen, on the other hand, would eat nothing but crap and thought that a toothbrush was only used to clean the cleats on his soccer shoes – and would NEVER have a cavity. Of course Johnny was the one who needed braces. The estimated cost (years ago) was approximately $3,700. Even though we didn’t have the hospitalization/medical coverage for that – you do what you can for your children. Johnny got braces and hated them from the first day. As time went on and Johnny continued to ‘beat his own drum’, getting him for his check-ups was grueling. I finally gave up. “Keep the damn wires on your teeth til you’re 45 years old for all I care – I couldn’t even get him to keep appointments! One day I even caught him with pliers (from his father’s tool chest) trying to pull them off! Ah, but look at him now! What a friggin’ beautiful smile!
Fall is around the corner - my favorite time of the year! Wonderful sunny days – no humidity (at least here in Ohio) and nights that you keep the windows open and get under the covers. If you’re lucky – you’ve got someone to cuddle with; if not, be glad you’ve had another day to enjoy! My best to all you Hazzard Ahead readers, I hope you had (are having) a great summer!
